Thursday, January 5, 2012

smell this...does this smell funny to you?

I saw the dead tree truck today. Let me clarify...If you have a real Christmas tree, they don't last forever (unless, of course, you have a real real Christmas tree), after the holiday (usually Christmas or New Years...or if your extremely lazy and feel the need to have a six foot pile of dry kindling in your living room, I guess you could extend it to Martin Luther's King Jr's birthday or if you have an unnatural love of arson, Valentine's Day) you take your tree out, and at least in my town, you put it on the sidewalk to be picked up by the city. That's the truck I saw, the city discarded dead Christmas tree truck. It reminded me of that scene from Monty Pythons the Holy Grail where Eric Idle is collecting the dead in a wagon that is being pulled through he streets.
here's the scene
...for those of you that don't bother watching the clips I always put on here (it's ok, you can admit it, I know there's a few of you...but you are missing out)...the humor of the clip is someone trying to put an old man on the pile that isn't dead yet all the while insisting "I'm not dead" and "I feel better" and "Can I go for a walk" and other non dead or dieing type things.

That's what the Christmas truck reminded me of.

...and that got me thinking of other things that are obsolete...or outdated...or no longer useful.

Such as,
Combo dvd and vcr players.

I don't even know if I have a vcr in my house that works anymore, but I probably have about a hundred "tapes". These combo players were once cutting edge, well at least for those of us that wanted to embrace this "new digital dvd technology" but were dumb enough to think that the vhs tape wouldn't go the same way as 8 tracks or then cassettes and then even albums (although I have to admit, I still do love my albums - but that's another story for another time). Christ, we're not far from dvd's being irrelevant as well. The dvd/vhs combo reminds me of my first stereo that had not only an AM/FM tuner and a turntable, but also an 8 track player...not even a cassette player...and 8 track player. Always loved how Smoke on the Water abruptly stopped at the end of track one and then, after much clunking and shifting, would restart in that spot on the next track. How come it didn't sound like that in concert?


Polaroid Instant Cameras
Remember these? You'd take your picture, then, vvvvt, the camera would eject this blank sheet of film that in a matter of minutes would miraculously appear as your photo right before your eyes. Amazing! Everybody had instant cameras, but not everyone had the Handle. I got the Handle one Christmas...I say around '77 or '78. I remember taking pictures of the albums I got for Christmas that year...I remember taking pictures of my dog Duke....I remember having pictures taken of me, usually wearing some sort of long sleeved striped rugby shirt with the sleeves pushed up my forearm (which was cool) or me in my Miami Dolphins pajamas (which was not cool). Good stuff.
I think one of the reasons the Handle may not have caught on was , picture quality aside, it weighed about seventeen pounds, although it did come with a nice nylon strap so you could wear it around you neck if you desired...or if you desperately wanted some sort of neck injury. That and the fact that you had to turn a crank to get the picture to pop out. Even in 1977 that was obsolete.
Kodak The Handle Instant Camera
Polaroid pictures, or at least the reference of polaroid pictures made a comeback a few years ago because of that Outkast song "Hey Ya". The line was "Shake it like a polaroid picture" and all of a sudden those millions of kids that made this a number one song got a history lesson of what photography for the common man was like prior to digital. It became part of our vernacular again. That's right vernacular.

But speaking of digital...that will soon be obsolete as well.
Check this out.   http://www.lytro.com/   Essentially this camera allows you to manipulate the picture after you take it. You know how pictures get ruined when you focus or include the wrong image in the foreground or background? The Lytro lets you move the focus off that object after you've taken the picture. You can switch a photo from 2D to 3D, change the perspective, or do whatever else you want to do to the image. This isn't Photoshop changes to an already taken picture. With the Lytro the photo is alive inside your camera.

This is Jetson's stuff we're talking about here...this is Star Wars...this is 2012. Wait, actually this is 2012.

Phone Booths
This struck me last year. We were in Epcot, in the World showcase, England specifically. We were taking pictures of my youngest standing inside a replica of an old red phone booth...like they used to have in London.




I realized it wasn't the quaint look of the red booth that intrigued her...it was the fact that there used to be these monoliths erected outside where you used to have to enter into, and you used to have to close the door (for privacy), and you used to have to pay money, and speak into a receiver (it is called the receiver, isn't it?) that was attached to a cord that was attached to the phone.
Ain't that a kick in the ass?


That Tupperware container in the back of my fridge
No explanation needed on that one


The point of this blog
I think I've "jumped the shark" on this one.
Google it.


Peace.

1 comment:

  1. GREAT morning laugh!!! Thanks Peter:) LOVE the description of the 'handle'....17 lbs did not know it weighed that much, just imagine the shipping charges in today's world with that one. As you definitely know, the combo dvd vcr and related electronics are never obsolete in the Jones house....if you need to see one in person, we have 2 just come on by. AND next time you are with us at Peaks we can show you our console tv complete with rabbit ears!
    Kathy J.

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