It's deuce, not douche...

That sums it up.

and this is the version..

Not this next one, christ, they play chopsticks at the end of this version for crying out loud..and, chopsticks played badly. Just my opinion but I think Mannfred Mann made a career out of sucking off other artists songs. At least they never destroyed a Bob Dylan song...oh wait a minute, how could I forget their awful version of The Mighty Quinn (Quinn the Eskimo). Go ahead and google or youtube that one yourself. I've had enough.

Ok Pete, get off your pedestal.

What brings us here today is the full explanation of this song's convoluted lyrics. As I've done before, I'll break down the lyrics for you so that the next time (or first time for some of you) hear this song you'll get to experience it with a whole new understanding and depth that didn't exist for you before.

Also, as before, my comments will apper in red so as not to confuse my poetic explanations with the actual lyrics of the song.

You're welcome.

Here we go...Blinded by the Light.

Madman drummers bummers and indians in the summer with a teenage diplomat

This line means nothing. Bruce was just showing off by using both off centered rhyme(where interior words in a sentence rhyme) and single, double, and triple pure rhyme at the end of each line, which you wouldn't pick up on until you get to the next line. Obviously.

In the dumps with the mumps as the adolescent pumps his way into his hat

I'd rather not speak to this one, it's so obvious
With a boulder on my shoulder feelin kinda older I tripped the merry-go-round

You've heard of chip on your shoulder, right? Well this is the same, but bigger, much bigger. I'm talking HUGE.
With this very unpleasing sneezing and wheezing the calliope crashed to the ground

See how big it was? We're talking thousands of dollars of damage here. Told you.

Some all-hot half-shot was headin for the hot spot snappin his fingers clappin his hands

This is a metaphor ...or maybe it's an idom. Like me biting off more than I could chew with this blog.

And some fleshpot mascot was tied into a lovers knot with a whatnot in her hand

The fleshpot was the mascot of the Asbury Park Polka Dot (Bruce did a brief stint in a square dancing group that went by that name). Wait a minute, now he's got me doing it too.
And now young scott with a slingshot finally found a tender spot and throws his lover in the sand
bow-chicka-bow-wow
And some bloodshot forget-me not whispers daddys within earshot save the buckshot turn up the band
"shut the front door"....if you know what I mean

And she was blinded by the light.
Slang for having to clean the toilet...you'll see....
cut loose like a deuce
Here's the line.
My friend Steve Buscemi told me that he and Springsteen rented a house on the Jersey shore the Summer that this song was written. Steve said the E Street band used to have contests to see which band member could do the longest...umm, how do I put this...you know, "back the big brown motorhome out of the garage"....or "dropping the anchor"...or maybe "freeing the chocolate hostages"...or how about a little less graphic "going number two". There you have it. Sorry.
Another runner in the night. blinded by the light
More slang for going boom boom.
She got down but she never got tight, but she'll make it alright
She didn't like it, but she sucked it up (no, not literally), took care of the mess, and got on with things.
Oh, and as an aside, guess who always won these bathroom contests? You guessed it. Clarence Clemons. No surpise there. I think that's where he got the nickname "The Big Man".
Some brimstone baritone anticyclone rolling stone preacher from the east
He's talking about Little Richard. Kid you not.
He says: dethrone the dictaphone, hit it in it's funny bone, that's where they expect it least
Except Richard said it so fast it sounded like "A whop bop a lua a whop bam boo"!
And some new-mown chaperone was standin in the corner all alone watchin the young girls dance
a stalker with a new haircut
And some fresh-sown moonstone was messin with his frozen zone to remind him of the feeling of romance
wink wink, nudge nudge...say no more...you know what I mean?



Yeah he was blinded by the light.
You notice it's "he" now, and not "she"..what the frig is going on?
cut loose like a deuce
Actually this is no longer about the E street band's "longest dump" contest..now he's playing cards. Just discarded a two. A two sucks in poker. They might be good in Acey Ducey, but I don't really recall.
Another runner in the night. blinded by the light
There's refers to Bruce's brother that stared at the Sun for two long. Blind as a bat. He was a marathoner. It's true. Look it up. Best blind runner in New Jersey
He got down but she never got tight, but he's gonna make it tonight
no comment

Some silicone sister with her managers mister told me I got what it takes
Ummm, a well endowed girl, right?
She said I'll turn you on sonny to something strong if you play that song with the funky break
The song she wanted to hear was "Doo Wa Diddy (diddy dum diddy doo) by, you guessed it, Manfred Mann.
And go-cart mozart was checkin out the weather chart to see if it was safe to go outside
Ok, this is getting a little tedious...please reference my comment on the first line of the song
And little early-pearly came in by her curly-wurly and asked me if I needed a ride

This line just goes to show that Bruce liked smoking the "boo boo bama" back in the day
Oh, some hazard from harvard was skunked on beer playin backyard bombardier
A drunk ivy league college student playing jarts..yes, jarts. Old school.
Yes and scotland yard was trying hard, they sent a dude with a calling card
I just spent 20 minutes trying photoshop a fake Scotland Yard business card here, but it's obviously beyond me. To bad, it was awesome.
 He said, do what you like, but don't do it here
...and that line was at the bottom of the card. See? Awesome.
Well I jumped up, turned around, spit in the air, fell on the ground, asked him which was the way back home
He said take a right at the light, keep going straight until right, and then boy you're on your own
Seriously, maybe my two favorite lines in any song. Ever. No lie. Genius.

And now in zanzibar a shootin star was ridin in a side car hummin a lunar tune
   


literal enough for you?

Yes, and the avatar said blow the bar but first remove the cookie jar, were gonna teach those boys to laugh too soon
Are we almost done?

And some kidnapped handicap was complaining that he caught the clap from some mousetrap he bought last night
I think this has something to do with Gilligan's Island, Bruce's favorite television show at the time. Still is as a matter of fact. Mine too. God's honest truth, I asked my youngest daughter today if she knew what Gilligan's Island was. Not a clue. I guess I've failed as a parent. Some day she'll understand all those references I make like, "little buddy" or "three hour cruise" or maybe even help explain my penchant for only building things out of bamboo. We'll see.
Well I unsnapped his skull cap and between his ears I saw a gap but he'd figured he'd be all right
...and this is a reference to burying Paul McCartney, but you have to play it backward. Try it.


He was just blinded by the light. cut loose like a deuce
Another runner in the night. blinded by the light
I think we're good on this now, don't you?
Mama always told me not to look into the sights of the sun
Bruce's blind marathoning brother did not listen to his Mom.
Oh but mama that's where the fun is
Don't talk back to Mother.


and that's all there is, there is no more.

All makes sense now, doesn't it? Crystal clear.
___________________________________

You don't know how close I am to posting the video of Mannfred Mann destroying Quinn the Eskimo.

Another time.