Saturday, June 22, 2013

Forty isn't old. If you're a tree. (Ode to Dave Cloutier)

To set the record straight, I'm over 40 years old. Well over. In another year I'll be actually be closer to 60 than I'll be to 40.



Jesus Christ.

How they hell did that happen?
(I just had to run the math in my head to prove it to myself. Unfortunately I was right).

I've got a friend that turns forty. Tomorrow. He didn't want a party.
Obviously he is growing wise in his old age.



I'm not sure if this post is intended to make him feel old...or me feel young.

We'll see.

If it makes me feel young than I should have written it a long time ago, because I haven't felt young in a long time.

Well, not since that night at the Saco River Grange Hall a month ago when I went to see the fiddle festival.
That was actually quite a good time....one of the funnest nights I've had in a long time...but if it wasn't for me, my lovely, slightly younger wife, and 10 year old daughter, the average age of the attendees would have been somewhere between 60 and 80. We lowered it to about 55.



(this is the Saco River Grange Hall)

So back to my forty year old friend.

This was the number one song when you were born.

(Unfortunately my friend just wore that same bright yellow shirt and light blue overalls that the guitarist in the video is wearing to a party last night. He's does a lot of things well, but dressing himself is not one of them).
This one makes me feel young. No way this song is forty years old. I still remember listening to it on my transistor radio and waiting feverishly for it to be played so that I could hit record on the cassette player that I had positioned the microphone in front of the radio speakers oh so carefully.

 

Wait. Now those pictures make me feel old.
Come to think of it, so did the description of how we had to "tape" songs back in the day.

All in the Family was the number television in show when this young buck was born


I remember this show as a kid. (for the record I was 10 years old). That doesn't seem that long ago when I was watching this show....except for the fact that Carrol O'Connor (Archie Bunker) was the same age I am now when he was playing this role in 1974.

That makes me feel old.
As a matter of fact I was probably more interested in the Hudson Brothers Razzle Dazzle Show on Saturday mornings than I was in All in the Family.


I'm sure that reference is completely lost on that forty year old.
Which makes me feel old.

Maybe he'll google it (if that's what kid's do nowadays to learn about ancient history).

The first car I ever owned (which I bought in 1980) was built in 1974.



That's right. The Ford Maverick.

I can feel the jealously. From all of you.
I'll bet my friend has held up better than any 1974 Maverick has. (Actually I've seen him in shorts. Maybe I'll retract that previous statement).

1974 was when Hank Aaron set the all time home run record, beating Babe Ruth's prior record of 714. He still owns the record , if you ask me.

I remember watching it at Eastern Slopes Campground in New Hampshire...probably on a black and white television with rabbit ears. In a pop up trailer.
  

Those were the days.

Not sure if that makes me feel old or young. That one's a draw.

Here's the decider.

We both stayed up late watching a playoff hockey game the other night.
Probably in bed close to midnight.
He got up at 3:30AM and worked a full day...mowed his lawn...and his next door neighbor's.
I saw him at a basketball game that night. He stood for the whole thing.

Me?

I slept in. Left work early.
...and fell asleep in the stands despite it being a double overtime thriller that both of our youngest daughters were playing in. If it wasn't for the crowd going wild when a girl from the other team hit a no look 60 foot three pointer with .2 seconds left in regulation to tie the game, I would have slept through both overtimes as well.

That's a bit of an exaggeration. I probably would have only slept through one of the overtimes.

Ok.
So I'd say the result of this had to make me feel older, not him.

...and just so you know, the fact that he built your own basketball court...outdoor fireplace...a table built from a full size redwood...re did all the wood work in his house...gives foot rubs to his entire family...makes breakfast every weekend...invented the internet..discovered gravity...and turned water into wine...

I'm not jealous.

As long as I remember the door knob coming off in my hand the last time I walked into your house (and the fact that you didn't install it is a moot point)...

Happy birthday Dave Cloutier.

You're a hell of a guy and a true friend.

kitty kitty kitty

you bastard

Thursday, June 6, 2013

horny music...

...like this.
Get it? Sure you do.

That , my friends , is an example of the title grabbing you then giving you something you didn't expect. As is the title of that song.... 25 or 6 to 4.

This one was a double entendre....but not all of them are.

I made a casual comment the other day that I excel at titles. I went so far as to say, (this is me speaking now), I think my next blog is just going to be a whole bunch of titles. So, in a sense, this is my next blog and it's going to be a whole bunch of titles...with the usual twists and turns and detours of trying to add some clarity or insight, when all I'm really doing is making things a bit more convoluted.

But that's ok.

I'm down with that.


That is the first detour. That's a palindrome, but it could be a clever title. Some day...but not today.

Some of the better (or at least my favorite) titles I've run through in the past 97 (yes, 97) posts I've created would be, in no particular order, some of these...oh, and feel free to Google - Pompatus of Pete, then any of these titles. It will take you right to that blog. I'll let you search out the ones that intrigue you, so no commentary on the titles themselves. You'll see the title often doesn't have much to due with the ensuing content
  • Strolling the kitties
  • Rise and shine Sleepyhead
  • Sometimes I...No, I don't
  • Who's the guy that writes those books
  • That ship has...now what's the best way to say it....
  • C'mon, I was only ten years old
  • Betty better butter Brad's bread
  • Would you do it for a Scooby snack
  • My day with Christopher Walken
  • HR Pufnstuf was naked...
  • Fifty shades of Pete
  • Put your big toe in the milk of human kindness
  • Mary liked to pour gravy on John's _____
  • Don't make me repeat myself
  • "Just don't give him anything good to hit"
  • Phil McCracken
  • If only the Beatles had been Canadian
  • Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine
  • Easy there big fella"

...and that's just skimming the surface.



That's me in the Scooby Doo outfit. This picture just skims the surface of why I was wearing a Scooby Doo costume.

Aside from some of those past titles, I've got a whole host of titles to unleash on you in the future. The danger of giving you a "peak under the tent" is that it may negate me ever being able to use these again.



But we'll see..there's no rules out here in the internets.

So, here's some of the future titles I've been toying with (some with a brief description of what I envisioned the blog to be about. Others, unfortunately defy description)

  • I prefer mine pink and juicy. but not bloody. (My cookout blog)
  • The ants are my friends ( a Bob Dylan blog)
  • Where's all the white women at? (referenced a few times in prior blogs)
  • Stand on the stair and stare at those homophones
  • Don't pinch her ear (say it slow....now do you get it?)
  • Is a 24 pack of crayons any less important than a 64 pack? (defies description)
  • Comma comma comma comma comma comedian
  • Doughnuts make make brown eyes blue
  • Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. (ode to Homer Simpson)
  • I saw her duck (inexplicable)
  • Three fish, one smelt (Rick Russell- third grade)
and on and on and on.

So maybe someday these will become future blogs. Perhaps not. Only I know the answer to that, and unfortunately, I don't know the answer to that.

Time to hit the hay...which come to think of it, was another one.


much love




Saturday, June 1, 2013

When was the last time you pitched a tent?

This post, I'm afraid, could enter into the realm of this prior post...

http://pompatusofpete.blogspot.com/2012/11/phil-mccracken.html

Don't say you haven't been warned.

The title has nothing to do with camping.

It has everything to do with a bunch of immature, yet educated and successful forty somethings taking something very innocent and turning it into something very very wrong.

You know what?

I can't do it.

I just deleted about 200 insanely profane ways to describe a man in a state of arousal, Then I realize I have coworkers that read this....my sister reads this...my oldest daughter reads this...my Mom reads this for crying out loud.

I couldn't do it.

You'll have to hit me up in person and I'll do my best to recreate verbally what I just deleted.

...and then you'll have to take a shower.

What the hell...I'll keep the photo at least.



Sorry.

So now what?

How about this?

June 1st and it was full on Summer here (here being Maine. ...and yes, you smartasses, there is Summer in Maine. Some years it might last from July 1st  to, oh, let's say, July 2nd, but it still is Summer).


...and I live about a mile from that picture in the N. No lie.


While mowing the lawn this morning, and battling heat stroke (no lie...I thought I was going down), I started thinking about the things I love about Summer.

Here's a short list of what I came up with...

Nights where you're having so much fun you lose track of time...oh, and throw in a big fire



Parades...



Braving the icy cold waters of the Atlantic



this....


Ice cream....


Kid's having outdoor adventures...


the radio on...


Anything cooked on the grill...


hide and seek...
Hide and Seek Champion

farmers markets....


playing with the garden hose...


sparklers...


Summer songs...


America's pastime...


...and maybe most of all...none of this...


Go out and enjoy the Summer. Do something you haven't done in nine months..before you can't do it for nine more.

“Summer's lease hath all too short a date.”
-Bill Shakespeare

Peace and love.