That's where it helps to have someone with the musical acumen that I've been blessed with.
First off, familiar with this?
Here's the lyrics, with my comments in red
To start with, this is one of those boy/girl stories....
So, she says it's time she goes
She's running down to the store..probably to pick up a pizza, maybe a bag of chips, probably some beer. Not really important, what is important is that she has no cash and borrows some from him, promising to give him back the change when she gets back.
but wanted to be sure I know
she hopes we can be friends.
Obviously sending him the signal, "There ain't gonna be no change honey".
I think, yeah, I guess we can say I
The guy is a little self important, notice how he refers to himself in the first person, actually both singular and plural, so would that be first people? ..or first and second people?
but didn't think to ask her why
"Where's my money?"
she blocked her eyes and drew the curtains
...obviously a diversionary tactic
with knots I've got yet to untie.
This is a poetic device called an iambic pentameter onomatopoeia alliteration (you'll have to trust me on this one)
(chorus)
The chorus is the part of the song that is repeated two or three times, depending on the laziness of the writer. It's also the part you keep singing to yourself when you can't remember any other words to the song. Tell me that's not the case with this song.
what if I was Romeo in black jeans
We all know Romeo, but what many don't know about Romeo was that he is actually the original "Man from Nantucket" from the infamous "Man from Nantucket" poem written by William Shakespeare
what if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth
Heathcliff was the famous cartoon cat that wasn't nearly as funny as Garfield...and that's saying something because Garfield was about as funny as Family Circus, easily one of the most unfunny comics ever written
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with.
Lap dancing I guess we can say I
See, it was just too soon to tell
and looking for some parallel
parallel was used here because it made more sense to rhyme that with tell than it was with smell
can be an endless game.
whatever
We said goodbye before hello
Obviously stolen from that Beatles classic Hello Goodbye, which we all know is about Siamese twins stuck in a room full of mirrors (maybe I'll explain that song another time, this one has me almost worn out).
my secrets she will never know
If she knew, it wouldn't be a secret then, would it?
and if I dig a hole to China
Which, by the way, we all know is impossible...but, if you fell into that impossible hole to China it would take you two and a half days to fall all the way through
I'll catch the first junk to Soho.
Typo..He meant SoPo, as in South Portland. The junk he is referring to would be my first car, a 1974 Ford Maverick , which if he had just taken the time to get to know, he would of realized what a lost classic that was and how it bridged the gap between the Ford Falcon and the Ford Fairmont. If you owned a Mercury Comet, it was essentially the same car.
(chorus)
what if I was Romeo in black jeans?
what if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth.
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with.
Do I have to explain this again?...please see the first chorus in case you forgot
Sometime from now you'll bow to pressure.
That's bow as in the intransitive verb meaning "to bend the head, body, or knee in reverence, submission, or shame and not bow as in "bow tie pasta".
some things in life you cannot measure by degrees.
remember in elementary school when we'd have to watch all of those movies about the metric system...how we had to learn the metric system because that is what the rest of the world used...how the U.S. was going to be using the metric system by 1980...well, 212 degrees fahrenheit = 100 degrees celsius.
I'm between the poles and the equator.
Which, by the way, could put you in Rangeley Maine
don't send no private investigator to find me please
unless it's James Garner, who playes Jim Rockford from "The Rockford Files"..remember that one?
'less he speaks Chinese
"unless"
and can dance like Astaire overseas.
no a stair...Astaire..you know, Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers Fred Astaire. The greatest American dancer of all time...with the possible exception of Elaine Benes (from Seinfeld).
what if I was ...
Fill in the blank....what if I was an Oscar Mayer wiener...or I was three inches taller...or what if I didn't know how to swim...or what if I was purple
so what if I was...
again, fill in the blank, but it has to rhyme with the prior line. Hopefully you didn't go with the one that ended with purple...
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with.
"Nobody puts baby in a corner" - Dirty Dancing 1987
(chorus)
what if I was Romeo in black jeans?
so what if I was Heathcliff, it's no myth.
maybe she's just looking for
someone to dance with.
really, the chorus again?.....
So, hopefully you'll hear this song with a new appreciation of the true meaning of the lyrics, giving you a deeper appreciation for the art of choosing the right word and how it adds layers
of complexity that you never knew existed before.
...next time we tackle Frank Zappa.
You're welcome.
