Saturday, March 23, 2013

If only the Beatles had been Canadian

One last Pompatus of Pete blog before the big name change. That's coming soon.

I promise.

This one is prompted by mistakenly watching American Idol the other night. It happened to be Beatle night. All the songs had to be Beatles songs. Most of the contestants claimed to "not know" or "had never heard" the songs they performed.

I ain't buying it.

It was an excuse for not being able to sing a decent song that didn't need to be auto tuned, or sampled, or whatever it is the these kids are relying on in music nowadays
So, the Beatles.


The Beatles were the best band. Ever. Period. End of story.



Even though this is just an opinion, it's an accurate one.
Even though you may disagree, you'd be wrong.
...and you'd have to prove to me otherwise.

Can't do it, can you?



Check this out....

They created pop music
They didn’t embellish it or make it better – they created it.  It started with their first album and came on strong with Rubber Soul and Revolver and songs like ‘Strawberry Fields Forever’, ‘Penny Lane’, ‘Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds’ were the fruition and evolution of a new style of music.  They were the trigger of a revolution that became pop culture.



They disbanded in their prime
John Lennon was only 30 when the Beatles broke up.   McCartney was 28.  George Harrison was 27.  Ringo Starr was 30.  They still had youth and they still had many years remaining in their prime but they stopped while they were on top, ending a string of success that is unparalleled.

Imagine Muhammed Ali retiring in 1974 instead of 1981 and what you have is the Beatles.


Imagine Elvis retiring in 1968 before becoming a shell of himself by his death, and what you have is the Beatles.


Imagine the Rolling Stones retiring in 1973, or U2 in 1987. If they had, they might have come close.

  

But they didn't. Too bad. That's a difference maker.

Where some bands play on (and on, and on, and on – i.e., The Rolling Stones, The Who), The Beatles stopped and became iconic.   No band ever called it quits at a greater time. Impeccable timing, even if it wasn’t planned to be that way at the time.

I mean seriously, would any of us have really wanted to see a new Beatles album in 1977 at #2 on the charts one notch behind Saturday Night Fever?


Not me.

They stopped touring at the height of their career
The Beatles, quite amazingly did not tour to support the 2nd half of their career.

The didn't tour to support the following albums...

Revolver
Sgt. Pepper
Magical Mystery Tour
The White Album
Yellow Submarine
Let it Be
Abbey Road

Name one band that ever put seven albums equal to that out in their career. Never mind supporting such albums with a multi million dollar tour.

I'll give you a minute.

Are you done?

Of course you are, because that band doesn't exist.

They bucked all standard practices and chose to grow up in the studio versus standing in front of 16 year old fans at oversold baseball stadiums with shitty acoustics.


So they stop touring in 1966 and what did they come up with?
How about these two gems?

A Day in the Life

“A Day in the Life” represents the peak of the middle-period Beatles, when no sonic stone was left unturned and every trip to the studio was an opportunity to do something no one else had ever done before. This Sgt. Pepper closer takes the “We Can Work It Out” John/Paul formula and fires it down Alice’s rabbit hole. The frame of the song is a gorgeous Lennon ballad, mixing real-life tragedy (the death of the young Guinness heir, Tara Browne) with stream-of-consciousness canoe paddlings, filling the Albert Hall with holes and splashing English imperialism on the silver screen, to the horror of the movie house. This piece on its own would have been noteworthy for its melodic beauty and lyrical adventurousness. But the Lennon bit is merely the foundation of something much more grand. An almost anarchic orchestral climb sends the listener to another place entirely – a bell-clear, everyday, up-out-of-bed-and-off-to-work place that seems comparatively mundane until the character has a smoke and goes into a dream. Then the world explodes again, with an ethereal, almost primordial vocal from Lennon sending the listener back to his own soundscape. This time, when the Lennon verse ends, all bets are off. We launch into an orchestral crescendo that hurtles headlong until the crash of that oh-so-famous final chord. Easily, this is pop music’s finest moment.

Phew.

and how about this one?

Strawberry Fields Forever


“Strawberry Fields Forever,” written in part about the garden where John Lennon (he was one of the Beatles) played as a child, is the sound of John questioning his sanity as the world swirls around him. A mellotron saunters along, horns blurt, a swarmandal (look it up) rains down, cymbals crash backward and nay-saying cellos saw at a tree, where John sits alone and wonders if he’s “high or low.” Sped-up, slowed-down, piled high with sonic elements and polished off with a little “cranberry sauce,” “Strawberry Fields” changed what a pop song could sound like. It stopped countless musical peers in their tracks – including Brian Wilson, who decided The Beatles had beaten him to creating the music he had idealized in his mind. It remains a bizarre, haunting and beautifully warped wonder.


Maybe this explains it better...The Beatles in 1967 were holding an aquarium full of tropical fish and everyone else was holding up blue construction paper colored with four crayola crayons.

So, these examples are just the tip of the iceberg. Don't get me started.

Everyone's entitled to their own opinion and I welcome yours.

I'll leave you with this...

Her name was Magil and she called herself Lil
But everyone knew her as Nancy


All you need is love
Love is all you need



Wednesday, March 20, 2013

It's Happening

...and it's happening soon.

There's a change a comin'.
Change is good.
Isn't it?


Pompatus of Pete as we all know and love it (and I know we all love it) will be no more.

It's going to be different.

And better.

Way better.



I've given this a lot of consideration. As a matter of fact I've been mulling it over for a long time.

I think you're all tired of reading about things like my ten year old correcting me on my improper use of the words good and well.



...or random thoughts about random things like...

The fickle finger of fate



...or me pointing out things like the fickle finger of fate line is used in that Supremes clip at the beginning of this post.

...or listening (actually reading) about me going on a rant because my neighbor in the cube next to me at work continually incorrectly pronouncing "across" as "acrosst" ...or "library" as "libaree"...or "nuclear" as "nucular"

...or listening to clip after clip of the same old tired music from the 60's and 70's
like this...


See, I can tell your bored already by the number of you that didn't watch that.
(I can tell you know)

So.. here's a promise
(actually more than one)

The next time you hear from me
1) My blog will have a different title
B) it will have different content
3) you will all thank me for the change.

So with that dear friends, I bid you adieu

Monday, March 11, 2013

11 records or tapes for $1.00

Can you believe it?
11 records or tapes for $1.00

I was one of the thousand (or millions) of kids in the late 70's that was a member of the Columbia House Music Club.

How else can you explain this being part of my record collection.



We all know Dan Fogelberg, but who the hell is Tim Weisberg?
I know he was a flutist....is flutist pronounced flautist? Seems so, but maybe not.
...and was it the beard and moustache that made them twin sons?..or was it because they had the same father.
Beats me.
All I know is I haven't listened to this since 1977.
but I can still remember the "hit single" from that album?

I'll bet Arthur knows.

I own this album thanks to Columbia House as well


This was from the Chicago sucks era that started with this album and went to approximately, oh, I don't know...now?
I'll tell ya, those guys look happy. Especially the one with the hat on ( I said hat on) getting dry humped by Peter Cetera. I swear I don't know what possessed me to buy this one.
I cannot name even one song from this album...and if you know me at all, I can't say that about many albums released between 1966 and about 1990. But, this one I can.

Unless of course it was one of the dreaded "selections of the month".

See, the way Columbia House scammed millions of teenagers out of bajillions of dollars was by sending their catalog with a little slip of paper that said in infinitesimally small print something along the lines of
"If you don't want the selection of the month please check this box and send back by x date"


The date was usually about one day after you received it in the mail...and the selection of the month was apparently arbitrarily picked by some monkey that they kept in the backroom of some closet on the fourth floor of their headquarters in Terre Haute Indiana

How could you expect a teenager to handle that kind of pressure and responsibilty?

I was still trying to recover from the dissapointment of Evel Knievel not making it over the Snake River Canyon.

God damn, those were simpler times.

Of course a few slipped through here and there.
How else can you explain me owning this one?


Actually I think I made the trip to Musicland at the Maine Mall to purchase this one. Probably rode my bike down the highway to get there.

Good times

"Do you remember the 21st night of September?'
Unfortunately I do.

But I don't remember the name of the store next to it that sold organs. And I don't mean livers and kidneys.
Although those might have actually sold better.
 But I still remember what my favorite meal at York Steakhouse was (It was the #4 medium by the way)

and making arrangements to "meet under the clock" - sorry no picture of that

(a little anochronistic for most of you, but I'm sure some of you will get it)

You live you learn.

Somehow I did avoid those Pablo Cruise albums they always wanted me to purchase.

Even at 13 I knew better than that.

Enough for know

as my friends Earth Wind and Fire would say...

Ba de ya...never was a cloudy day

Peace and Love

Sunday, March 3, 2013

I don't believe in Peter Pan...Frankenstein or Superman

Anyone know where the title comes from?
How about now?
I think Freddie Mercury proposed using nude men for the video, but that don't work so much...for obvious reasons.

Let that one sink in for a minute Cloutier.

Road trip tomorrow. That's when some of my best (and I use that term very loosely) ideas for my blogs come from. Oft times it's attributed to what I may be listening to at the time. Music is always a good fall back for me. I frequently add thoughts/opinions/clips of songs into the insipid blogs of mine.Here's a case in point...
http://pompatusofpete.blogspot.com/2012/06/put-your-big-toe-in-milk-of-human.html

I've got the same trip coming up tomorrow that inspired that blog. Fingers crossed there's no flying cows this time.

...and this time I'm going to comment on the soundtrack to be before I hit the road... it also gives me a chance to make another list, which, by the way, is also a fairly common fall back on these blogs

One other thing, can't promise this but I'll try not to be redundant (although that has been my middle name since I changed it from Joel when I was about twelve years old).

Let's see how this goes. Maybe some clips, maybe just comments

So, drumroll please....these will be the start of what I'm listening to in the car for about five hours tomorrow.

Ready    Set     Go !

Once in a Lifetime -Talking Heads
     "You may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
     You may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife
     You may ask yourself, well, how did I get here?"


I've been thinking lately what a great band this was. I blew off my Babe Ruth All Star game to see these guys during their Stop Making Sense tour. I'm not saying this is what derailed my baseball career. I'm just saying.
David Byrne = Genius.



Montana - Frank Zappa
I'm providing the clip for this one.




The company that I work for posts announcements (when people accept new positions) where they ask you canned questions (or at least they used to, not so sure anymore) like... what's your favorite food...or favorite quote or some such other favorite thing.
After my last job shift, on my announcement Q and A I wanted to work in the line...
"I'm moving to Montana soon, gonna be a dental floss tycoon"
But I didn't. I didn't think anyone would "get it"
I should have.
Coward.

Frank Zappa = Genius

Without You - Harry Nilsson
Harry Nilsson = Genius (just thought I'd get that out of the way early this time)

Unless you're Dana Dodge...or my brother (not sure if either of which reads these blogs), you probably don't know this one.
Hence the clip...




     If loved ones wanted to only play Harry Nilsson songs at my funeral, I would not be upset... and not only because I'd be dead.

Clap for the Wolfman - The Guess Who
My favorite Canadian band. Well after Neil Young. And Joni Mitchell. And the Band. and maybe Bare Naked Ladies...I think you get he picture.
Only other song I know besides the Joker by Steve Miller that has the word pompatus in it.




Blue - The Jayhawks
Maybe one of the most melancholy songs ever written. Noticed I didn't say sad.
It can't be all about rainbows and pinwheels all the time can it ? (and truly when is it ever about rainbows and pinwheels. That doesn't even make sense. I apparently have that analogy mixed with someting else.)
     "Where have all my friends gone. They've all disappeared"
See. Melancholy.




Bungle in the Jungle - Jethro Tull
A couple of reasons.
A) Because there was no Jethro Tull. Right? Everyone knows that's just the name of the band. Don't you?
2) What else rhymes with jungle?
C) Fungal wouldn't have been as good. Would it?




Tightrope - Leon Russell
     "Like a rubber neck giraffe
      you look into my past
      Well maybe you're just to blind to...see"
Love it. I ran into Leon on the sidewalk after seeing a show of his with a dear old friend. I'd ask her what I may have said to him, but I'm not sure she'd remember the encounter.
Good times.



Someday, Someway - Marshall Crenshaw
I love me some Pop music and this is some good pop music.
This one's got sing along written all over it.
My band (Pete and the Bombers) rocks this one out like it's nobody's business.


Annie - Pete Townshend and Ronnie Lane.
Trust me. You don't know this one.
From one of my favorite albums (yes, albums)
Ever.

Please enjoy enjoy this one. It's friggin' beautiful.
Like my daughter Anna.


"Old oaks stand tall, Annie
Seen the world grow small, Annie
But when they fall, Annie, where will we be?

A Girl Like You - The Smithereens
I like the name of the band.
...and I like this song.
 A power pop classic (if there's such a thing)
     "I'll say anything you want to hear
      I'll see everything through
      I'll do anything I have to do
      Just to win the love of a girl like you, a girl like you"



Don't Know Why - Norah Jones
   Sexy and sultry and breathy and lovely and more
       "Out across the endless sea
         I would die in ecstasy
         But I'll be a bag of bones
         Driving down the road alone"
I'm feeling it.



There. Those will at least get me in to Massachusetts.


...and I gots to get up early tomorrow.

Maybe I can finish this from the road tomorrow or the next day.

But then again, perhaps not.

If this inspires you to discover at least one of these songs, my job here is done.

So it goes.


Tuesday, February 26, 2013

When TV was good

Listen kids.
TV used to be good.

TV commercials , back in the day, were more memorable than any sitcom or "reality" show or "talent" show (quotations are intentional) that is on nowadays.

TV commercials were so good that they are still memorable today
They were so good that some products had more than one memorable hook....no pun intended.

Take tuna fish...that's right, I said tuna fish.

Recognize this guy?



Sure you do. That's Charlie the Tuna.

Charlie thought that his sophistication, style, and charm made him the perfect tuna for Star Kist tuna.
As a kid I think I thought Charlie was always drunk...and it seemed ok.
The commercial always ended with a hook being dropped under water in front of Charlie. On the hook was a note that said SORRY CHARLIE....
...and then the narrator would say, "Sorry Charlie, Star Kist doesn't want a tuna with good taste...Star Kist wants a tuna that tastes good".

Genius.

...and Charlie always took this as bad news. Apparently Charlie had some sort of death wish. Why the desire to end up in a can, put on a grocery shelf, and ultimately mixed with some mayo, spread between two slices of bread and end up in some kid's school lunchbox I'll never know. Or even worse, fed to the cat.



Then again, you could Ask any mermaid you happened to see, What's the best tuna?"
Apparently she would reply, "Chicken of the Sea".


Except if I saw this mermaid in the sea, I might mistake her for the Sea Monkey Mom. ..and what I'd want to ask her is "Were those humans in the ad somehow transformed into the sea monkey family, and if so, what do you miss more, you no longer having a vagina or your husband no longer having a penis?"


See the resemblance?

Let's not forget the meat by product category.
Oscar Mayer had two winners for two different products.

Hot dogs



By the way, this photo was taken on I-295 in Maine after the last snow storm. What the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile was doing in Maine in the middle of February I'll never know. Ain't a lot of cookouts happening in Maine in February. Just sayin'.

Where was I? Ahh, the slogan...

Oh, I’d love to be an Oscar Mayer Wiener….. That is what I’d truly like to be….. ‘Cause if I were an Oscar Mayer Wiener….. Everyone would be in love with me!

Really?

That would never work today. I don't know how it worked then.
Ain't the double entendre a wonderful thing?

The other was lunch meat

How about this kid? Cute, huh?


Here was his big moment...

Oscar Mayer brainwashed an entire generation into thinking that baloney was spelled B-O-L-O-G-N-A.

Which, of course, was just wrong.

By the way, this little boy made it big a second time as an adult...does he look familiar to you ?...


Unfortunately it wasn't as Ronald Macdonald..it was as Captain Crook.

Ultimately he met his demise when he got busted for drug trafficking. Maybe you read about it. He, the Hamburglar, and Grimace were busted digging a tunnel from McDonaldland to Tijuana. It was Officer Big Macs biggest bust to date. The pardon from Mayor McCheese never came.

Jeez, there's so many more...
"It's not nice to fool Mother Nature" Turns out Mother Nature was quite a biotch.

Calgon's "Ancient Chinese Secret"...which I'm not sure was the true ancient Chinese secret



"Please don't squeeze the Charmin" uttered by the eternally creepy Mr. Whipple



"I can't believe I ate the whole thing"...unfortunately uttered (at least to himself) by Pompatus of Pete far to often. Same company did "Try it you'll like it", which, also unfortunately Pompatus of Pete did far too often with far too many things when he was a young lad.



"Is it live or is it Memorex"? It was obviously Memorex, oh and for my readers under thirty, this is probably the most obsolete reference of them all. It was for cassette tapes, by the way. Ask your parents about the broken glass. Trust me, they'll remember



That's it for now.

I have to go reach out and touch someone.

Peace. (now that's the best slogan of all)

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Double secret probation....

..welcome to the road to nowhere.

Pretty cool.

Speaking of shaking...were you a Coleco or a Mattel man?

Do you remember these?
    

I, personally, owned and preferred the Coleco, on the left.
However the Mattel was the standard bearer for handheld games. Close my eyes and I can still hear the beeps and tweets that emanated from this little device. This was the scourge of study hall teachers everywhere when I was in Junior High. I think I just read that there was now an app that recreated that Mattel model for your phone or ipad. Even technology likes to go old school.

Those two beauties were not to be confused with the table top electronic football game.

This was essentially an electronic vibrating pad that had little plastic football players dancing around the field like a bunch of drunken Bart Starrs. I don't think anyone I knew actually played by the rules, for instance there were felt footballs that you could (supposedly) have your quaterback throw and have your kicker boot. That never happened. What happened is that you would spend about an hour lining up your team in the most creative formation you could think of whilst your opponent did the same thing.

Then you'd flip the switch and watch the players seizure their way down the field. If I remember right once a player from the other team vibrated into the player "carrying" the ball, it was considered a tackle.
Take a look.

The last time I played this my team lost 2-0. The other team got a safety on the last play of the game. My team had one yard to go for a touchdown. I spent forty five minutes lining up my team for the winning touchdown. My opponent (Dave Cloutier) did the same. I flipped the switch ready for victory. Instead all eleven of my players vibrated into a scrum in the middle of the field and commenced to work their way backwards 99 yards, all the while protecting the quaterback from being touched by the other team, until we got into our own endzone. This is when they decided to make like Moses and part the Red Sea so that the other team could make the big play. Dave still claims it was his strategy all along.

Oh, and this was just last night.

Geeks.

That's when we broke out the table top hockey game.


This, on the other hand, was all about the skill. You had to push,pull, and rotate the levers to control the players on your team. Compared to this, foosball was for kindergartners. We'd get so animated playing this that we surely dug a few trenches into some kitchen tables.

Ah..good times.

I think that's it for today. I have to return Dave's Merlin game to him today...that is after I figure out the pattern to magic square.


...now where did I put those penlight batteries?

Peace out.

Thursday, February 7, 2013

He's no Dan Marino

A little warning...this blog will be about absolutely nothing, sometimes it works, usualy it fails. Horribly.

This one is just me blowing off a little steam.

Here's your chance to pull out before you go any further.



Sorry about that.

...not really.

The title of this blog refers to what my go to reply has been to most anything this week.



I've been using it on facebook, in the doctors office, at work...everywhere. All the time.
Not one person has asked me yet what it means.
Not one.

Here's what it means.

Nothing.

...and know one's questioned it.

Don't you love it?

I used to have a friend growing up that we called Bart Starr. For no reason. That's just what we called him.

Maybe that's its genesis.

Give it a try the next chance you get. Use it casually. Let's see if it has any legs. Maybe it will be the next
"Dy-no-mite"
or
"Here I come to save the day"
or at least
"Yabba dabba doo"


That last one might be a bit of a stretch.

As I write this the STORM OF THE CENTURY is being forecast where I live. (notice the capitalization)
Weathermen are forecasting 24 to 100 million inches of snow. Depends on which expert you listen to.
Either way it been upgraded from a severe winter storm warning to a blizzard warning.
Apparently a blizzard is far worse that a severe winter storm.



I showed it full size so you can all see the enormity of it.

The weathermen are so excited about this that they all have to do their weather reports sitting down.
(If you know what I mean).

Fortunately for them, theres not accountablity in a weather forecast. So you miss the accumulation total by a few dozen inches...predict a sunny day and all you get is rain...miss the temperature forecast by 20 to 30 degrees. Who cares?
If the margin for error was that large for my job I'd look like a friggin' genius...and believe me, I'm no friggin' genius.



There's no way this storm will beat the storm of '78.
 

Those are actual pictures from that storm.
Those are cars abandoned on the highway.
For reals.

No school for a week.

Good times.

No way this storm touches that one.
No way.

Oh, and this storm has a name.
They (who they is I do not know) now name winter storms.

Do you want to know the name of this storm?


Nemo.

No lie.

Doesn't exactly strike fear in your heart now , does it?

What is the world coming to?

Enough of this....I don't have any energy left.

This is me pulling out early, so to speak.

It's been a hard week and I'm plum tuckered out.

Maybe my next blog will be better.

...but I hope not.

Love you all.

...especially Dan Marino


Saturday, January 26, 2013

Cold enough for ya ?

This is Three Dog Night

...and this is the day after a three dog night



A three dog night means it was cold people.
It's been cold here lately..and by cold I mean COLD.

Biting...bitter...glacial...numbing...penetrating...Siberian...piercing.

Friggin' cold.



The last few mornings have been colder than the temperature in my freezer. Or yours
Think about that.

It's the kind of cold where people do things like bring a pot of boiling water outside, chuck it up into the air, and it turns into snow. Instantly. Oh, and they film themselves doing it. Like this.


That's just stupid. That's more stupid than the people that cook an egg on the sidewalk in the Summer...or maybe almost as stupid. I don't know. You decide.


I'll take that over easy. Hold the dirt.

Back to the cold...
So, add that colder than your freezer temp and let's add in some wind.
That's when it gets good (and I mean in a bad way).
That's when we can start talking about wind chill.

That's not how cold it IS..that's how cold it FEELS.
(as you can see theis blog is directed at all the non Mainers that read this. If you're from Maine, like me, you learn about wind chill before you go to kindergarten. For everyone else, I'm not so sure).


The wind chill the last three days..
22 below zero
12 below zero
4 below zero

Let that sink in for a minute.....

I feel kind of guilty because as I write this the current wind chill is all the way up to 6. Yes 6. That's four less than ten. It can get 25 degrees warmer and water would still freeze....and I'm thinking it's warm out.


The cold has obviously affected my ability to reason.

I saw this guy hitch hiking the other day

This gentleman knocked on my front door and asked to spend the night on the couch the other night because it was so cold.

So I let him in.
Next morning he left without saying goodbye, but before he left he apparently peed all over my floor.
I'll never do that again.

Normally I'll just start the car, turn the defroster on, let the car run for a few minutes, and I don't have to scrape the ice of the windshield.

I said normally.

Hasn't seemed to bother my cat much though.

Ok...enough of this.

Oh. one more thing...
just how cold is a witches tit?

Peace out.